AYOKO NA SAYO at HINDI NA KITA BABALIKAN KAHIT KELAN!

Bakit kaya may mga tao na kapag sinabihan mo ng totoo, siya na nga may kasalanan NAGAGALIT pa sa’yo.. In denial ba? Alin kaya uunahin ko i-blog, let’s see.. Kung bakit umalis ilan sa helpers namin dahil di na matiis ugali niya at pananakit sa akin..tinanong ako ng family ko tungkol sa mga pasa ko sa katawan..pumasok ako sa HTMT, nahilo, na-clinic tapos nakita nung nurse/doctor/TL ko yung mga pasa ko sa katawan at 3 bukol sa ulo dahil sa suntok..yung emails sa akin ng babaeng dini-deny niya..yung photos ng ibang babae..yung di naman nagpo-provide sa anak pero nagbigay ng pera sa ibang babae pa ulit para makabyahe sa China and Norway (2 different women)..’yung paninira mo sa akin sa mga friends and family mo para lang hindi nila maikumpara na wala palang kwenta yung mga babaeng ‘yun (your words not mine)..’yung sinabi mong dimo naman talaga minahal si CCB, napilitan ka lang dahil kay kuya..’yung sinabi mo sa’min ng friends mo na sa “iba” si kuya..etc, etc, etc.. LAHAT na lang! Para maisaksak mo diyan sa utak mo kung BAKIT AYOKO NA SAYO at HINDI NA KITA BABALIKAN KAHIT KELAN! Sa lahat kasi ng AYOKO yung babaligtarin ako at palalabasin pa na NAGHAHABOL! Bakit ba HIRAP na HIRAP KA PANIWALAAN na AYOKO NA SAYO at mas PINILI KO na lang na MAKIPAGKAIBIGAN SA’YO for BON’s SAKE?! You know what? Ang TAGAL ko NANAHIMIK at puro LIES ang sinasabi ko sa anak ko para nalang HINDI MASIRA ang PAGMAMAHAL at PAGTINGIN NIYA SA’YO (pero nung puro GOOD THINGS na HINDI naman TOTOO and sinasabi ko sa anak ko at mga tao, WALA KANG REKLAMO!).. sana dun na lang, MATUTO KANG i-APPRECIATE at IRESPETO AKO! Pero wala ka nang ginawa kundi MANG-AWAY, INSULTO, MAGBINTANG.. Kahit KASALANAN ng IBA sa’yo, sa AKIN MO BINUBUNTON ang GALIT MO.. Dahil dimo magawa sa kanila, dahil alam mong PATATAWARIN din KITA.. I guess it’s high time I reveal these things para alam ng FAMILY and FRIENDS MO ang TOTOO and most important of all, para MAILABAS KO ang lahat dahil hirap na hirap na ako itago… siguro by doing so, MAPATAWAD na din kita… Thanks for MAKING ME REACH MY BREAKING POINT.. maiilabas ko na din.. I HAVE TO LET GO OF ALL THE NEGATIVE FEELINGS.. maybe after that, magsimula nang mag-HEAL and FINALLY MAGPATAWAD.. You see? HINDI NA TALAGA KITA KAYANG MAHALIN dahil sa mga GINAWA MO.. Hindi kayang masapawan ng love ang HURT and ANIMOSITY that I have towards you… 

I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU ALL THE PROOF that I HAVE!

Finally natulog din si Bon.. Ayaw matulog hanggat gising ako so I had to stop making the meatloaf and tabihan muna siya. I would have finished making it an hour or two ago but may nang-abala kasi and nambwisit sa text. Nagpapaka-dramatic actor about things in the past and siya pa ang galit. I said I was busy cooking but makulit talaga. So I said “buburahin ko siya”. Aba, INUNAHAN AKO! Lol! Para namang hahabulin ko ang taong SIYA NA NGA ANG MARAMING KASALANAN SA AKIN, SIYA PA ANG MALAKAS ANG LOOB NA AWAYIN AT INSULTUHIN AKO! And UNTIL NOW, DINE-DENY ANG MGA KASALANAN NIYA! SCRIPTWRITER and POSER daw AKO! Ghad! Like I told “YOU”, WAG MOKO GAGALITIN coz YOU WOULDN’T LIKE IT WHEN I REAAALLLY GET ANGRY!!! Matagal na kita PINAGTAKPAN and PINAGTANGGOL but this TIME, na SINASABI MONG WALA KANG KASALANAN and AKO PA INIINSULTO MO.. I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU ALL THE PROOF that I HAVE! Pasensyahan na lang tayo.. DINAMAY MO PA ANG ANAK KO!!! Nangba-BLOCK ka pa eh alam ko naman na MAKIKISILIP KA DIN sa COMMON FRIENDS NATIN.. Don’t worry, HINDI KITA PAHIHIRAPAN. I’m going to set ALL MY POSTS to PUBLIC.. Nagmakaawa ka sa akin noon NOT TO POST ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR INDISCRETIONS dito sa FB or sa BLOGS ko coz AYAW MO MALAMAN ng LAHAT esp ni BON ang LAHAT ng mga KASALANAN MO.. coz YOU SAID that anything na ma-POST sa INTERNET will FOREVER BE THERE.. YES, THAT’S TRUE! Pero YOU LEAVE ME NO CHOICE! AYAW MOKO TANTANAN SA KAKA-DENY, AWAY at INSULTO MO then SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES! Fuck, AKO na nga lang NAGPAPAKA-TOTOO SAYO at BINIBIGYAN KA NG PAGKAKATAON TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU’RE “SO LOST” and YOU NEED MY HELP… Well, too bad for you I HAVE A LOT OF TIME TO WRITE now.. with PHOTOS!!! Just YOU WAIT!!! >.<

BEAUTIFUL and LOVE

Just now: Bon:”Mama, 2 words — BEAUTIFUL and LOVE” Me (Not paying much attention since I was checking my accounts and FB): “Uhumm, beautiful and love.. what about those words?” Bon:”It’s for you! YOU’re BEAUTIFUL and FULL of LOVE! I LOVE YOU!” Me (guilty mode coz I wasn’t paying attention): “Ahh, thanks and I LOVE YOU, too baby!” Sweet and precious moment na sana when Bon:”Can you turn off the netbook and tv now, mama? It’s late. We need to sleep now.” At siempre si mama ang nasita ng may punto namang anak.. Wahaha! Good night everyone, sweet dreams and God bless! Mwah ♥

I just feel sooo tired yet accomplished!

Warm bath done.. wanted to stay in the shower an hour more but kailangan ko na patulugin si Bon.. Was out almost the whole day. Bon’s school in the a.m. Had to pull Bon out around lunchtime so we can go to the mall to look for his Scientist costume, get a haircut, have lunch and go home before 3pm (coding). Didn’t find a costume in Trinoma. =( Had my nap around 4, prepared dinner around 5, left for SM North around 6 and got home at 8:43pm. First time ko inabutan ng blackout sa SM and yikes, it was quite scary so I decided to have my dinner at home instead. I just feel sooo tired yet accomplished.. Got EVERYTHING Bon needs for the photo session in school tomorrow! I wanted Bon to just wear his Taekwondo uniform (para di na sana gumastos ahehe but he really wanted the Scientist costume coz he said he wants to be one when he grows up). Nakakapagod man maghanap sa buong mall (2 malls at that!) but seeing my son’s eyes light up, my baby smiling really wide, hugging and kissing me while thanking me and saying I love you made all the effort truly worth it! Nyah, tinulugan na ako ng kulit ko.. hahaha! Good night everyone and God bless! Mwah ♥

Tiring yet good day!

Got home around 9pm. Tatag ni Bon, woke up at 5:20am coz we had to leave before 6am, natulog lang for an hour and a half on the way to Sta. Cruz, Laguna and gising na gising na until now.. Tiring yet good day coz we were able to see our relatives.. Had a wonderful surprise when we got home! From a sad moment — ate Cez’ interment to a happy, happy moment — a visit from our princess, Izza sweety! Lalo nagising si Bon coz of his cousin. Gusto patulugin using the little rocking chair he has here. Pangarap talaga ni Bon patulugin si izza dun! I really need to clean it soon coz dati pa nya binilin sa akin.. hehe! Another great surprise — Blueberry Cheesecake! Nabasa ni Imee Victoria andReinier ‘yung post ko and they brought my fave!!! Thanks so much! Chaka na ang diet.. nyahaha! Love you both! Will upload photos tomorrow. Really tired.. hindi pa nakaka-recover sa pagod sa field trip ni Bon yest and sa byahe to Sxl today. Good night everyone and God bless! Mwah ♥